dirty

you might think im doing a christina aguilera ditty but no im not. its dirty literally.

it was moving day over the long weekend. nope i didn't move out of dear mandaluyong. my sis and i just moved a few blocks away. my mom insisted that we do so. she has been telling us to do that eversince she left, but you know me, the lazy ass that i am (my aunt who came over to help us pack a few days a go said to my sister that my room hasn't seen the broom or the dust rag lately hehe) ... so finally i was convinced to get my dirt out and move to a new place.

picture crazy me has not yet taken a pic of the new place. things are yet to be repainted, fixed and put away. unless you wanna see my tons of clothes in garbage bags or strewn all over my bed. remember my old room? small box right? well my new room is smaller. *lol* i had to put some of my stuff in the hallway cause i would have to sleep downstairs if i force everything in the room. even the landlord was surprised when he saw our stuff. he was like " Ah, dami nyo palang gamit. 2 lang kayo di ba?" uhrm. yeah.

whats funny too was we repainted stuff and we sometimes forget that we just did. so we clean up. forget we painted a wall and end up touching it. then clean again. pati hair may paint... ugh. it was a cycle. i wanted to fall asleep on my feet. and 3 days na we're not done yet! and im spending na my money on furniture and renovations...naku, naku, naku...

so back to work. pero paguwi back to cleaning.

ok im posting something sad ulit. i can't help it. sigh. seems like i've been doing this(sighing) for some days na rin. sometimes i forget but sometimes i still remember the pain. a friend heard about it and told me "you have a prob pala...bat di ka sad?" well i am. i just don't show it too much. nakakahawa kasi... :) anyway a lot of people who knew about it asked me a few times "in love ka na ba?" i couldn't answer a straight yes or no. i couldn't understand din kasi. maybe i was in love with the fact that someone liked/wanted me. yeah i guess that was it. and it hurts too because i was wrong. my heart was wrong and my mind was right all along. i lost and i'm not too used to that feeling.