Saturday afternoon

I liked how he hugged me close and gave me a lingering kiss on top of my head.

He makes me feel special.

Even for awhile.

Darn it

I wanna run...smash into you...

Beyonce on repeat in my ears.

I promised I'm going to be just 'chill' about it.

I'm cool.

So darn tired

I feel so sleepy.
Probably because I've been staying up real late at night for the past three days.
And I'm still in the office until now.
Pouring everything in work and chatting with friends.

Because I don't want to think about YOU.
But then again since I've written this entry, so I am thinking of YOU.

I know.
It's crazy.
Because I don't want to hold back.
And it's getting harder to do so.

Rushing leads to incompleteness

That's what my horoscope today told me.
And I completely understand what it is saying.
It means that I have to be patient.
And trust Him.

On the other side of the news,
I admit I was bothered with the picture of Miffy Randy posted on his page.
The words 'I miss my bunny' burned.
Flash back of "movie scenes" of what could happen.
But in reality I know it would not happen.
With him it would never, ever happen.
I think my heart knows better this time.

The healing has begun

I dunno how I managed to keep my head above water.
But I did.
Strong hands lifted me up.
Friends pushed me in the right direction.
Someone has placed a band aid on the gaping hole in my heart.
And somehow I'm smiling again.

The truth revealed

i could not believe that he did that to me.

it's now over.

after he promised to always be with me

i have never felt so alone in my life.

I cried again last night

It is now officially two weeks since he last spoke to me. Four weeks since I last saw him. I thought I had stopped crying about it yesterday but the pain just became overwhelming again last night.

I keep on asking myself how can a person love you one day and not love you the next?

I am praying fervently everyday to God, not for us to reconcille but for him just to talk to me. Even if he tells me to let go at least I'd know it's time to move forward.