here i go again...

im feeling melancholy again. i want to go out so that i won't think about him and me (i just can't bring myself to the term Us kasi wala namang Us) and yet i wanna wallow in sweet, sweet sorrow. argh.

i dunno why i subject myself to these things. ilang beses ko na ring naitanong yan sa sarili ko. they say i should just drop it. dati sabi ko madali lang naman yun. now it's hard.

di ko na alam talaga. if only i could throw away this damn celfone. or i-off man lang.

ang hirap ng di mo alam kung san ka lulugar. you can't ask questions. you can't say how you really feel lest you reveal more than you should.you can't say some things dahil baka magmukha ka lang tanga, di mo magustuhan ang marinig mo or malamangan ka. it's hard being vulnerable. ang galing ko magpayo na take risks so you don't have what ifs or regrets. pag risk taker ka din pala, masyado masakit pag laging head on collision. kaya marami ring takot. ako kelan kaya ako aatras?

ano ka ba patty sala ka sa init, sala ka sa lamig.

...But feeling good about someone does not always mean that the person is right for you. Life is always a choice between what we want and what we need, between what is acceptable and not, between what is right and what is wrong. There are many times when we are consciously aware of the right path to take. But as we think more of ourselves than of others, we intentionally ignore all the danger signs and follow the road to our own destruction...

dyusme pati ako nakakarelate na sa lovenotes... erks.

tago muna ako sa shell ko para magmukmok.