Wednesday, January 19, 2005

could have beens

"You don't love me?" I asked.

He had sadness in his eyes, as if ashamed of what I just figured out. He didn't say anything, but he didn't have to.

"It's okay... I don't love you either."

We laughed. Feeling silly of what we just said to each other. Instead of the normal 'I love yous' of couples, we said the exact same opposite.

"But we are so right for each other," he said with a hint of desolation in his smile.

"I know, right?" I agreed. "I think for my part, there was just this huge urge for me to take care of you."

He touched my face and kissed my lips.

"But...""It's okay," I interrupted.Silence. He looked at me as though he wanted to hug me. Comfort me. Let me know that I'm going to be okay... Frankly, I am.

"Is there someone else?" I asked finally. I know I wouldn't be able to forgive myself if I didn't.

"Well..." He looked down.

"Really?" I jumped up, curious. "Who? The girl from..."

"Uhhhh..."

"Come-on," I punched his arm slightly. "Who is she?"

"I'd rather not talk about her," he said smiling. "What about you? Is there someone else?"I looked down, the smile disappearing slowly.

"No," I said softly. "But there's a dream of someone else..."

I got this from menasha's blog. it sort of reminded me of a conversation i've had a few weeks ago. similar in so many ways. yet the girl in the story was brave enough to ask. or yet she had an inkling. where as i was clueless.

anyway what date is it today? this day could have been something special.

joy told me my entries are always sad. is it? i would also have wanted to post something happy but then again this is what's happening to me.

naka smile naman ako lagi ah... :)

7 comments:

leahtong said...

ano ba yan...ayos ka lng ba ate patty? di ka nmn depressed nyan? katabi mo lng ako, pwde mo nmn akong pagbuntunan ng sama ng loob mo if ever...lol. kulang pa yung inom mo last nyt..yaan mo sa friday, ako bahala sayo...lol

leahtong said...

BATHWATER
No DOubt


Oh yes I'm guilty
You and your museum of lovers
The precious collection you've housed in your covers
My simpleness threatened by my own admission

And the bags are much too heavy
In my insecure condition
My pregnant mind is fat full with envy again

But I still love to wash in your old bathwater
Love to think that you couldn't love another
I can't help it...you're my kind of man

Wanted and adored by attractive women
Bountiful selection at your discretion
I know I'm diving into my own destruction

So why do we choose the boys that are naughty?
I don't fit in so why do you want me?
And I know I can't tame you...but I just keep trying

'Cause I love to wash in your old bathwater
Love to think that you couldn't love another
I'm on your list with all your other women
But I still love to wash in your old bathwater
You make me feel like I couldn't love another
I can't help it...you're my kind of man

Why do the good girls always want the bad boys?

So I pacify problems with kisses and cuddles
Diligently doubtful through all kinds of trouble
Then I find myself choking on all my contradictions

'Cause I still love to wash in your old bathwater
Love to think that you couldn't love another
Share a toothbrush...you're my kind of man
I still love to wash in your old bathwater
Make me feel like I couldn't love another
I can't help it...you're my kind of man

No I can't help myself
I can't help myself
I still love to wash in your old bathwater

menasha said...

Hey, thanks for the comment. =) And thanks for visiting my blog. You know what the weird part of the whole conversation was?... He was the dream. ='/

poison ivy said...

You give your hand to me
And then you say hello
And I can hardly speak
My heart is beating so
And anyone can tell
You think you know me well
But you don't know me

No you don't know the one
Who dreams of you at night
And longs to kiss your lips
Longs to hold you tight
Oh I am just a friend
That's all I've ever been
Cause you don't know me

I never knew the art of making love
No my heart aches with love for you
Afraid and shy I let my chance go by
The chance that you might love me too

You give your hand to me
And then you say goodbye
I watch you walk away beside the lucky guy
Oh you will never know
The one who loves you so
Well you don't know me

You give your hand to me
And then you say goodbye
I watch you walk away beside the lucky guy
Oh you will never know
The one who loves you so
Cause you don't know me
Oh no you don't know me
Oohh...you don't know me

nhila517tm said...

ate patty... i dont know if i should say na... parang you're always bitter about everything.. oh such a drama queen.. and ako rin, i know.. hahaha!!! mabuhay ang mga gustong maging artista... sabi ko naman kasi, let's approach Mr. M and pa-add tayo sa cast ng new show ng HUNKS eh... err, sa HIRAM na lang kaya? what you think? ... kasi, parang .. alam mo na... hiram lang tayo ng sandali sa... ummm... wag na nga, LOL!

cheer up, girl!

eventuallypretty said...

jaded na siguro ako harhar.

oist audition na ako actually sa "my firsts..." hehehe

... beachfreak said...

Oh God. Sister, we have to talk talaga. I dunno. The girl was really brave to ask. Sana ganun din ako. Pakshet. You take care, Patty.